Sunday, March 25, 2012

I think its time to say goodbye...

Time to move on...

It hard to believe that
my single again..
rebound brokenness..
began ALMOST 3 1/2 years ago.
This blog was started over
3 years ago.

My dad often says
'to everything there is a season'
and I feel like this season
for me,
is done!

No, I am not involved with anyone!
Yes, I am still very single!

the journey seems to have
reached an end.
At least this part of it...
I seem to have settled in the place
I am.
Where I began
is so different then where I am now.

I was broken,
now I am whole.
I had lost my identity,
now I am sure of who I am.
I was willing to compromise
now I stand strong!
I was unsure if I could be alone.
now I know I can!
I did not know if I ever wanted love again,
now I am sure that I do!

I do not know what the future holds..
If I am meant to be single
I know that I will be OK!
But, what I am able to acknowledge now
is that I hope to find love and goodness and forever.

I have taken this last year
and taken some chances,
some dead ends
and some wrong turns!
I have learned that dating can be tough,
and that sometimes
just waiting is better!
I have learned that friendships
are invaluable!
I have learned that family time
That teaching my children
to be happy with less
is a lesson worth learning!!
That even with less we can do more
then we imagined!!
I have learned to co-parent with grace,
a lesson that has been learned
by both parents involved!
I have learned how to navigate
the single life
without compromising being a mom
first and foremost!
I have learned to ask for help..
and to become as self sufficient as I can.

I have learned so much
that I would not have learned
without purpose!
and much I could have lived without
learning at all...

My blog has been my therapy..
but as life has settled so have my posts!
And now, I think
that its time to let go of the blog...
not close it!
but, keep it to look back on..
while hoping that if down the road;
I ever post again-
it will be not so single..
in a world not quite as complicated!!:)

Sunday, March 11, 2012

What I want..and what I hope to be...

I wrote the "WHAT A GIRL WANTS" list July 2011
Tonight I wrote What a girl wants to be!
The more I heal
the more I see
not only what I am looking for-
but, what I am looking to be
in return!

What a girl wants..

...and What a girl wants to be!

So here is my list;

1) a man that shares my faith

2)a man that has kids or completely respects that I do, and understands all that entails.

3)a man with a stable and rewarding job

4)a man who makes me smile!
I will do my part to keep him laughing!

5)a man that is flexible
life happens!

6)a man that makes me feel valuable to him
He will never doubt his worth to me.

7)a man that does not see the need to drink excessively.

8)a man who watches his language around me.

9)a man that makes me feel safe
he will feel safe and confident in who we are together,
and who he can be with me!

10)a man who respects who I am, even if he does not share all my quirks
This goes both ways...

11)a man who will communicate in good times and bad
I will purpose to be open and not allow things to fester and build.

12)a man I am attracted to
and I will let him know this.

13)a man that makes me feel attractive

14)a man who knows who he is and is comfortable in his own skin.

15)a man who accepts and understands the demands in my life,
as I will understand the demands in his, and do my part to add
to the positive not the stress.

16)a man who embraces my love for my family.

17)a man who encourages my time with friends.
understanding the boundaries that keep the relationship first.

18)a man who has his own healthy hobbies

19)a man who smiles easily
I will always smile back!

20)a man who handles his stress appropriately.
I will find outlets for my stress that do not affect the
one I am with!

21)a man who is respectful to those around him.

22)a man who treats his mother kindly.

23)a man who understands and accepts the role he will have with my kids,
not as a father, but as a respected man in their lives.
I accept and understand the role I will play with his.

24)a man who likes being a man.

25)a man who likes, or accepts with kindness, animals.
at least most of them..:)

26)a man who wants a balanced partnership

27)a man who will allow me to talk things out when I feel hurt
I will listen when he is hurt as well!

28)a man who will not keep me guessing
and vice versa!

29)a man who will be faithful
I will be faithful ,loyal and true!

30)a man who will enhance my life emotionally,
and allow me to do the same for him.

The man I am looking for may not be all of these things,
but he will be more of them than he is not!
Some are deal breakers,
some are not..
but all help me to define
what I hope to have,
what I hope to be,
I hope to find!