Sunday, October 2, 2011

Birthday recollections....

Today is my birthday!
38 years old..
or young..
or somewhere in between.

The first 32 birthdays
were pretty routine..
all good in their own ways!

But, 5 years ago-
birthdays took on a whole new meaning!

5 years ago..
my girlfriends took me to dinner-
my gifts?
items to start my new life.
I moved out of the house
I had built with my husband
of almost 15 years..
5 days after that birthday!

1 year later..
I was taken to dinner by the man
I would marry in just a few days!!
We got in a fight..
because my ex called our kids..
ON my birthday!
caused an issue..
I ignored the warning..
I was married again
with the week!

1 year after that..
I was dreadfully unhappy...
the man I married
surprised me with a hot air balloon ride,
a grand gesture..
a picture taking opportunity..
in the midst
of hurt and anger..
yelling and threats.
it was a birthday that ended
once again in a fight..
as once again
my ex called our kids...
on my birthday!

1 year later!
I was divorced again-
I was still finding my footing!
a friend took me to dinner
and for a pedicure!
It was nice..
I was still sad.

1 year later..
a GREAT night out with
SEVERAL friends!
Including a man
I had just started dating.
the dating was short lived..
the friendships STILL strong..
and that birthday
the start of a new me!!!!

1 year later..
3 years single-again..
happy !
another night out with friends!
this time..
I was not reserved.
I was not guarded.
I was free of all hurt!
I had a date with me..
it was obvious before the night
was over..
that I would not see him again-
but, even that was good!
I laughed with my friends..
I felt loved and celebrated!
I felt 'home'...

5 years of hurt and heartache...

and now today..
a weekend of celebration..
first with friends..
then with family..
and today with my kids-

and what I know;
is that I get stronger
with each birthday..
wiser with each lesson..
happier with each year that passes!!

and even as another birthday passes...
without that 'special' someone-
the people that celebrated with me
remind me
that love comes in all packages..
and that a complete life
is a celebrated life!
and this weekend..
that's exactly how I felt..


  1. I am glad you enjoyed it. It sounds like you've had a turbulent few years (and I know how that feels!!) so I am glad things are finally settling down.

  2. Happy Birthday dear friend!! Glad you had a good time with all the people who love you!!
    More to come...I am sure

  3. Self love is the best love of all! I can't wait to get there :)