The many layers......

I keep thinking
that I might reach the end
of the lessons..
get to that 'single' place
that is defined.

And yet..
it does not happen.
I keep learning more...
growing...
regressing..
progressing...

When I first found myself single,
my whole world
changed.
I knew than
that I did not know who I was...
I knew what I was;
a wife, and a mother.
but what about
when those roles shifted?
what then!?

I set out to find out
what I liked
and did not...
who I was alone..
and in a crowd.
I learned how to 'be'
and how to cry..
and bigger I learned
how to heal.

but somehow,
I shifted some of that identity
into being a 'single mom'
with young kids.
The business
of doing so much alone,
the struggle of providing
and getting an education.
The role once again began to define me.

Now, as my kids get older;
and still need me..
but differently!
as they begin to find their identity..
I am wondering
if I still have mine?

A new type of identity crisis...
a new exciting,
while daunting place to be.
Single..
a mom..
a Single mom..
single..
a Woman..
a Single Woman.

all roles-
but all different!
Now..
I get to focus a bit more
on the individual aspects
of who I am..
and learn how to be Single..
while still a Mom..
since I think I am now
quite comfortable in the role
of 'single mom'..:)