I finally get it...

Life is seeming to settle..
Kids are happier..
normal, testy preteens:)
but happier..
And more then anything I am handling it all better..
less frustrated..
and yet I am busier then ever!
so what gives??

Of course, I have less stress..
I have a home..
a job..

BUT its bigger!!
I used to dismiss the 'oprah' theory
of give to yourself first
so you can care for others!
I believed that others came first no matter what..
and of course, I believe in selflessness
and giving to others..
and all that jazz...good jazz!:)
However, I finally get the theory!
As I begin to find a balance
that includes my needs
my life feels more in control!
Its not big things...
time is limited!
Its the small things..
bedtime early enough to read..
a cup of coffee in the quiet of the morning,
a few minutes to work out
or prepare food for me, not just the kids..
its children in bed early enough to allow me
time to just be...
the little things!
BUT they add up!
and in the end
the little moments you take for you
create a bigger picture,
a better mom..
a healthier family!!
its little
but it makes a BIG difference!

sundays...quiet..reflection... and concerns...

I love Sundays!
I have not always felt that way!
as a child 'Sunday naps' were torture!
BUT, now I understand the need!
Now, I get the idea behind 'family time'..
and the need to refresh before a very busy week!

I have begun to grasp the need for a down day..
and I protect that at all costs!
A day to regroup and not to run...
and Sundays are it!

It is also a day to reflect..
where am I in my walk with Christ..
where am I in my journey to healing..
where am I as a mom?..
where should I be instead!

And it leaves me with time to think of all that has happened
and wonder at some of the effects!
Some of the choices that still affect me....

All is all
Sunday is a day to let the last week go
and prepare for the week to come!
And as a single mom
it has become my day for me..
and for my children...
a day that will be protected
and I believe will play a part
in the healing of our hearts
and the emotional well being of our souls...

Happy Sunday to you!

what the fourth means to me...

I love the 4th of July..
I don't love fireworks that much...
BUT I love the ideal behind the celebration!
I was not born in America!
In fact I was born in a country that was anything BUT free...
I was born in central Africa..
my childhood holds memories of guns,
glass on outside walls..
burglar bars...
slavery..
and segregation!
It also holds memories
of Kariba Dam
and wild life reserves..
the shores of cape town
and table top mountain!
A beautiful continent...
A wonderful childhood...
but It was not FREE!
Then when I was 12 years old..
My mom and dad left everything behind
to come to AMERICA!!
We landed in New York...
and forever my life was changed!
They gave me the gift of freedom!
The gift of citizenship
in a country that allows you to be who you are..
and love who you choose..
and live where you want!
A country in which my American children
can grow up one day
and become leaders of this nation...
a country that is free!
And this July 4th
Freedom rings even more true to me..
and This land that I love
is even more sweet..
and the parents that risked all to give me a future
hold my heart and appreciation more then ever before!
Happy 4th of July!!