phew...better then expected!

So I went to my first staff meeting,
and I loved it!!!
It was a totally new experience,
lots of ladies...
different ages,
all teaching different little stages.

The teacher I will be working with,
is wonderful!
She is very like me;
relaxed and easy going..
much more about the relationship
with some structure thrown in!
She even had turtles in her room..
and as an animal lover,
that made me happy!!:)

So much of my new life
looks so different then my old.
And yet I am filled with
the same contentment I had...
when living the life of my dreams!!

It truly shows
that contentment
has nothing to do with your actual circumstances,
and everything to do with embracing
where you currently are!

Looking forward to Monday...!!!:)

It's a New day...

So many new things about to happen...
I start a new job in just a few shorts days..
my kids start a new school in a few short weeks...

Both bring some nerves!
This job is a new location and out of my 'town'.
Treading new waters for sure!!

The kids have the blessing to go
to a private christian school..
but, it means leaving the friends they knew!
They are feeling the jitters
and having second thoughts..!

But, I feel
that both these new things
will be GOOD new things!!
The kids and I will end our days
together by 3 pm!
That's so HUGE!!!!
I will be going back to school!
They will be in a school
that allows them to learn about their faith!

I will be meeting new people..
and so will they!
and I am just as nervous
as them!!:)

First staff meeting tonight,
already I wonder;
will I fit in?
will I meet anyone I connect with?
will they get me?
you know- the single , quirky, vegetarian
mom of 3.
:)
so, I feel my children's fears..
and I walk in their shoes!

BUT, I believe we will all be happier
for this new path!!
and I am excited to see what comes!!!

ridiculously simple...yet it ridiculously hurts!!

so I wonder if these tiny pricks of hurt
will ever fully go away?
I am so far beyond the broken, sad person I was!
I am so much stronger!
and I am happy!
really happy in my life!

But, when a heart was once broken,
it seems the scars might still bleed
easily!

Tonight..
looking at some public pictures..
I glimpsed one of ex's new love!
It was taken on a trip they took.
Here is the part that pierced my heart!
NOT that they took a trip-
been there-done that!
BUT that the picture was taken of her..
by him!
AND never in all our years
(16 .. but who is counting)
do I remember him wanting to catch a moment of me!

It hits that little sore spot..
that little place
that was rejected and discarded!
and it hurts!!
I will not lie!!

It passes..
and its over!
and the scar has healed over once again!

But, I wonder...
will I always be so vulnerable?
so strong and yet so fragile?
Will my heart forever bleed
when it is pricked?
or will there come a time
the scar will knit so tight...
that pin pricks to my heart,
will not longer cause me harm?