Tonight is the start of my weekend..
without the kids.
As I sit....
playing on Facebook..
watching the news..
feet on the coffee table...
dogs sleeping near by on the couch..
I feel relaxed.
I know I can sleep in...
I know that no-one
will need cough medicine,
or water,
in the middle of the night.
I am off duty.
I am enjoying the moment..
and then unbidden..
I remember,
I focus..
I understand...
This is not what being a
mom was meant to be!
I was meant to yearn
for nights out with friends!
I was meant to host weekly
sleepovers..
and make weekly Saturday
morning breakfasts..
I was meant to make cliche
statements
about sleeping when
the kids left home...
I was meant to feel cranky
that I was never in the house
alone..
I was meant to think about
'finding myself'
when my kids were grown
and gone.
I was meant to be on duty
ALL of the time...
I was not meant to
be here..
right now...
alone...
relaxed...
still...
enjoying the sounds of silence..
while counting the cost
of the absence.
I take the moment...
because it is here;
it is mine!
But, sometimes,
all I want...
is to give it back!
After raising my tribe, all I want is alone time. Enjoy it as much as you can.
ReplyDeleteI surely understand these feelings!
ReplyDeleteHugging you
SueAnn
I do miss my regular weekends, but when people comment on my not really ever getting time off, I always respond, "Well, I didn't have them intending to share them with someone I was no longer married to, so I really don't mind having them with me all the time!"
ReplyDeletewhen the sons were home all I wanted was a time without them. I cherished the all too few times that they weren't here. Mainly because it gave me 'me' time that was much needed. That me time recharged me so that I was ready to deal with life with the sons.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your me time.
Love this post!
ReplyDelete