Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Why alone feels so different then..not alone...

So, its time..
I am on the hunt for a job.
Summers are good for me
as I can survive and thrive
and enjoy the time with my kids.

But, August is on the way!

I try not to feel nervous.
I know that I can manage for a bit!
I know that we will not starve...
and I know that I will not loose my place to live!
I am luckier then most!
But, still!

Facing joblessness
alone-single-as a mother
takes on a whole new meaning.
I know in a couple things can get VERY tight.
But, in a solo led family
and if you drop this ball,
there is no one coming behind you to pick it up!

I was raised very traditionally!
My father worked!
My mother raised us!
I married into a traditional marriage!
My husband worked!
I raised the kids!

So this has opened my eyes to both sides
of this coin.
No matter what the future brings
I will always understand deeply
the pressure of being the breadwinner!

But, the present is here...
and the process
of pounding the pavements has begun.
With it the fear of rejection
and the excitement that comes
with new experiences!

And always-
that little part of me,
that has to keep pressing forward
so I do not look back!
So I do not evaluate why I am here!
and how different things might have been.

Its a reminder that perspective
comes easily when waters are clear...
but when they get muddy and sticky and bog you down,
your perspective can sometimes get cloudy too!

So here is to a new day!
new hope!
and clear vision!

Life being hard in the moment
does not change the promise and hope
that the future now holds!


  1. Good luck to you!!!! Hoping you find something that you enjoy!

  2. I understand those words completely. I am not from a traditional household nor a traditional marriage. My mother worked for half of my childhood and I have worked my entire adulthood. Survival.
    It is tough to support solely. And most times a woman makes less to do it on. Good luck and I know good things are in your future.

  3. You got this honey! Sending *good job* vibes your way.

  4. Oh I could have written experience was very similar and I was in your shoes just a month ago. I did find something and start in 3 weeks!

  5. Good luck girl. You are a strong women and will find a job I have no doubts.

  6. Good luck on the job hunt. I hope and pray for you that you find something soon. And better yet, that it's a job that you truely enjoy.

  7. I grew up in the same sort of traditional family with a mother who dropped out of college to marry my father and raise the kids. When they divorced, she went back to school, became a teacher and went to work. There was never any question in my mind about the importance of a woman having a career, regardless for the choice she made about staying home with children. And now that I am a single mom and supporting a household on my own, I'm very thankful for my work.

  8. Good luck. Don't think of "no, thank you's" as rejection. They are lessons, chances to evolve, change how you pitch yourself, reason to bone up on some new skill. Every interview is helping mold the breadwinner you will become. And you'll get that job!

  9. Sending you tons of good luck and confidence, I just know you will do fine.......:-) Hugs

  10. Amen and amen!! I just know you will find something exciting and you will love it!!
    Try to enjoy the process and things will go fine!!