Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The collateral damage

There is no doubt,
mistakes carry consequences!
Misjudgments bring penalties...
such is life!

I made a mistake
when I got involved
in a rebound relationship!
It was a misjudgment!
It is a regret!
The collateral damage
is the part
that leaves me the most distressed!

Some of this
is now in the past!
The kids have moved on!
I am healthy and whole!
We are secure in our lives!
But, some..
will never be fixed!

During this time
I lost friends!
Friends that mattered!
Sometimes it was due
to loosing touch...
Sometimes it was because
I pulled away!
but, always
the friendship paid a price!

Most of my friends
now understand!
Most of my friendships
are intact!
But, I lost one of my closest friends!
The damage
was too great.
The hurt too much!
I have tried to mend the rift..
I have done all I know.
But, it seems that
the friendship will never recover!

Sometimes I am just OK
with this!
I have WONDERFUL friends..
who love me
and support me..
who understand me..
and forgive me my flaws..
I have friends that laugh with me..
and friends that will cry with me!
I am blessed!

But, to loose a friend
I cared about...
because of a choice I made..
a decision I moved forward with...
is very sad!
A friend..
whose children loved my children..
our babies grew together..
our lives mattered to each other
at one time..
its just sad!
sad for many reasons..
but sad because
in moments
it is a reminder to me
of the devastation
that our choices can cause!

Its on my heart today..
because of a dream I had last night!
So today
I feel sad about
my regrets!
Yet, letting go
and moving on
is the only way
to really heal...

I have had my heart broken
I have experienced broken dreams...
and I have lost friendships I treasured!

So now...
I learn!
I live!
I let go!
I make sure
that I never repeat
the missteps
that brought me to this place...

I walk forward
never forgetting to look back....


  1. Sometimes friends come into you life for a reason, for a season.. sometimes its for life. Don't beat yourself up. Your true friends will be there through ANYTHING! Not taking away from your friendship you are missing.. but one thing life teaches us is the truest.. best.. most treasured friends are those that love you not only during the good, but during your darkest times.. they do not stop because you make mistakes.. they love even more during those times. I pray you will be reminded of those friends during this time, Debbie.. you are kind, sweet, amazing woman.. and a treasured friend too many.. focus on those that love you truly UNCONDITIONALLY!! For that is what a true friend really does :)

    Love ya,

  2. It is very hard to lose a close that really mattered. Who knows what the future will bring...but maybe...just maybe..the friendship will be restored with enough time and distance. One never knows!!
    Hugging you

  3. I think that when we learn from our mistakes, they become so much more than a mistake. Hang in there. *hugs*