Wednesday, April 13, 2011

The what if's no longer exist...

I will admit..
While I do not live in my past-
I have at moments wondered;
what if??

What if,
I was who I am now- then!?
What if, so was he!?

What if,
I had held tighter,
or let go sooner,
or waited longer,
or decided faster,
or understood more,
or talked less,
or ............

It was not until LAST night
that I finally
got it!!
It would not have
mattered!

I believe in forever,
and I believe in commitment-
and I believe you fight through the hard
parts...

BUT I also believe in love..
love that is bigger then a feeling...
or a choice-
I believe in LOVE that fills your
every cell,
and invades your every pore!
I have felt that..
and what I know,
is that sometimes...
love is JUST not felt
by both!
NOT that kind of love-
and sometimes,
two people just do not work!
and sometimes,
you can move mountains
and the results would be the same!

I do not believe in fate..
but I do believe
that some people fit together-
and some do not!
and if you do not..
and you both do not want to
fight
DESPITE that,
the what if's are irrelevant!

It was just not for US...
the what ifs
are what 'nows'?
and the healing from the past is
complete...
because
I understand!!
I get it...
and I am free
from looking for fault,
and I am free from wondering why-
I am free from any forms
of whats? and ifs?

I am free to one day-
love that way...
again!

2 comments:

  1. That's great! The 'What Ifs' can really drive you nuts. And yeah, some people just don't fit together, no matter how hard one or both try. Sometimes, it just doesn't work.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The "what ifs" are a natural part of being human, but it's good to be able to let them go as they arise.

    ReplyDelete