Sunday, May 24, 2009

so changed...

This week has been enormous
in terms of acceptance
and realizations!

To start...
I have taken the time to
truelly reflect
on not just the hurt
of the past 3 years,..
but also the blessings that have come as a result!

In doing this
I was able to look at the relationships
and find my purpose
both within them
and without them...

My first marraige...
I reflected on...
I see the gifts and moments
that were mine
and I am thankful for those!
I am thankful that
for 9 years
I was a stay at home mom...
I am thankful that
I was able to spend
so much time with my kids...
that is a gift I was given..
a gift they were given...
something that was because of whom
I was with..
and something that I would not be the same without!

My second marraige
the gift was not within the relationship
but instead when I left!
Because of this relationship,
I learnt to be alone..
because of this relationship
I learnt to be independent...
because of this relationship
I am stronger then I was 2 years ago..
I am at peace with my 'singleness'
I am OK with being alone..
That is a gift that came from my second relationship!

In looking at the blessings...
I was more free to begin to let go of the hurts!

And then after a week of reflecting...
and making peace..
and focusing on the good...not just the bad...
I realised today..
the guilt is gone..
the feeling of fear is gone..
the responsibility I carried on my shoulders
for the breakdown of 2 marraiges
is no longer there...
I have forgiven myself for not seeing more clearly,
for making mistakes..
for being human.

I have found freedom
from the inside out....


  1. Excellent post! You are getting there, healing and growing. How wonderful, congratulations!


  2. Oh, I love these posts! I'm so happy for you - finding yourself in a better place. YOU are a gift, my friend!

  3. Awesome!
    A new and fresh beginning.

  4. Wonderful. Freedom comes with a price, and now you can truly enjoy it.

  5. Freedom from the inside out - that's awesome! Glad to hear you're enjoying so many awarenesses. Gratitude is a great attitude to have.

  6. Debbie...I left you a little award at my blog at


  7. Debbie, I felt this a wonderful way of eclipsing the past with its disappointments by the way you have grown in strength and ability to cope - plus looking at the positives. Best wishes ~ Eddie

  8. Debbie, I found your site through Breeze - what a lovely, motivational piece you have written. As women, it is easy for us to accept the blame and responsibility for things like marriages that do not work out. I love how your perspective as shifted to looking at the gifts you received from your experience! Very empowering for you and all others!