Wednesday, October 28, 2009

hard lesson...BITE your tongue!!

I have lived by the rule..
in my home
since divorce..
that words should be chosen carefully,
especially about my ex!
I have chosen not to put him down to the kids...
and even go as far as to tell them stories
about his childhood or our dating days...
I want them to know the man I knew...
in spite of my broken heart!
In addition, I have tried to be careful to watch my words
about the woman in his life!
The one he loves now..
but loved too soon..
before he was free to love her...
while he should have been loving me!
Sometimes, I slip!
In truth I am 'justified!' based on the baggage!
BUT in reality
it is my children who pay the price!
I did not realize how 'loose' with my tongue I had been..
until in front of my ex husbands live in love-
my children shared things I had said..
that were not flattering nor very nice!
While I contemplated crawling in a hole
or pinching my kids ( LOL)...
I learnt a BIG lesson!
No matter how much time passes...
no matter how much hurt there remains...
NO matter how wrong the injustice..
words are powerful
and they will come back to haunt you..
if you do not take the time to think
before speaking!
ESPECIALLY in front of your children!
Lesson lived, noted and learnt! !!!!!


  1. Yes Debbie, comeover and pinch me too. it's just been one year since the divorce and yet not sure what I am looking for. Vindication perhaps. I need to say too much because my boy can see what the dad is. I tend to want to rub it in, but of course need to control. Yes it will come back to haunt us all. Yucks. Take care dear.

  2. oh haha a slip of the tongue!There's still a funny side to it though and I mean haha... I think she deserves to hear whatever bad thing that is! BUT as civilized people as we are, yes, we should be very careful with the things we say when around the kids! ONLY for the sake of the kids but otherwise whatever, you're too nice to even think about the ex- and the woman's feelings, it takes a lot of courage and composure!^^ you're doing great!

  3. Very good point. I need to watch myself more too.

  4. Very wise words to live by, but so HARD to do.

    You have an adorable family, and cute pets by the way!!