Tuesday, June 1, 2010

my dreams..speak my hearts secrets...

*sigh*
I seem to be doing so well alone.
And in truth I am.
I am no longer 'lonely' ,
while I would enjoy companionship.
I am not sad when faced with time alone,
instead I get quite excited!!

BUT, through my dreams..
a reoccurring theme,
is telling my heart..
that I miss something!!
While it is physical;
It is not 'make me
OR you blush' physical...
it is simple, soft touch!

My dreams have been so odd...
a man of no significance
putting their hand on my shoulder,
or back..
leaving it there...
Taking my hand and lacing their fingers in mine,
for no apparant reason.
The impression is dramatic...
I wake up shaken as it makes no sense..
and I realize its not the person..
its the action
that is making the impression!

WHAT I miss is the feeling of being loved,
and cared for.
The feeling when someone takes your hand,
the intimacy of intertwined fingers
or when one you love softly touches your cheek,
or brushes back your hair.

I am surrounded by love.
Friends who hug,
children who embrace...
but, the void is different.
Its the belonging that comes
with certain , safe yet deeply intimate,
expressions of touch.

Gladly, the only place my soul
seems to ache for this,
is in my dreams...
and for now,
the only place my heart
will find the reprieve..
is in the same place;
my dreams!

It makes sleep both welcome
and heartbreaking...

5 comments:

  1. Dreams are powerful things. Maybe your subconscious is telling you it's okay to love and be loved again. Touch is magical. But letting down defenses and feeling vulnerable takes courage and time. Happy June!!!!!

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  2. Ah, I agree. Sex is wonderful (in fact, I'm a huge fan) but I most crave those affectionate touches that make you feel cherished.

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  3. Yes the touch would be missed. And dreams can be poignant reminders. I have no advice here Debbie, just a heartfelt hug!
    Hugging you
    SueAnn

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  4. There is nothing like the feeling that comes from intimacy that goes beyond sex... I truly hope you find it again

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  5. I understand. Completely. I too am single and have been for a long long time. Am in no hurry to change it but sometimes, I miss the touches.

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