Monday, April 6, 2009

How am I?? ..I wish I knew!

Its a loaded question...
to a loaded heart!

Sometimes I am happy!
Sometimes I am confused!
Sometimes I am strong!
Sometimes I am overwhelmed!
Sometimes I find life delightful!
Sometimes I want to run away!

And today;
I am all of these!

Trauma, hurt, brokeness, pain, grief...
it leaves you shattered.
The broken pieces of you
rejoin as one.
You are now whole..
but you are not!
and each of these pieces
has a heart of its own!
and each of these pieces
feel different things...

slowly, the shattered pieces merge..
and some connect as one!
The piece of your heart that was raw and broken
merges as one with the piece of your heart that holds hope.
Now you hope...but with less innocence.
The piece of your heart that was angry and bitter
merges with the piece of your heart that is strong and determined..
and you overcome....but with a heavier burden to carry then before..

and bit by bit..
your broken heart
merges with your soul..
and you begin to heal
but you are not the same...
and you are filled with emotions
and thoughts
and fears
that you never knew existed.

And beneath your smile
and beneath your strength
lies your humaness...

and sometimes somedays
its all you can do
to hear your heart
and listen to the cries of your broken pieces
and find the strength to let the person you were
and the world you used to see
shine through
in spite
of the world you now know to be!

8 comments:

  1. You are Debbie and you are wonderful! All those bits will and pieces will form you into a stronger, healthier version of wonderful you!

    Keep going..you're on the right path!

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  2. Part of being a woman is living through a multitude of emotions, thoughts and feelings on a daily basis! (God help us all). I still do this, but overall, some emotions will prevail, and those positive ones will more more evident and lasting longer than the others.

    You're doing so well, keep it up!

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  3. Debbie,
    You may want to read Proverbs 1:2; It will be an encouragement to you.
    Lily

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  4. Debbie,
    Read your blog today-My heart breaks for you..My encouragement to you is to stay faithful in the Lord. I am a walking testimony of how life can be when I am faithful and obedient to the Lord, and when I have not. From a broken marriage to a restored marriage, and now a child where I never thought I would have another, etc. There are blessing for Gods children, which you are. I will pray for you!

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  5. Hang in there! Sounds like you are definitely on the right path. You'll be a stronger and wiser person because of this. :)

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  6. This was beautiful... and you described how I've felt for the last few years with AMAZING clarity. "You begin to heal, but you are not the same..." The most apt description I've seen. Thank you... xo

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  7. If you get a chance pop over to my blog I wrote a poem with you in the back of my mind! It's called Falling In Love.

    www.breezedaze.blogspot.com

    Breeze

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  8. Of course you can print and frame it Debbie. I commented on my blog but thought I should here in case you didn't get over to mine for a while!

    Breeze
    xxx

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