Monday, December 21, 2009

New memory and new dynamics!



Tonight my children and I
were blessed by the chance
to go on 'the polar express!'
we happen to be one of the cities that does it!
it was a blast!


the first hurdle was getting my kids to wear PJs in public..
I, of course, wore them too!
The rest of the night was a lesson
in the changing dynamics of our family!
The kids are getting older!
so they had so much fun,
but also created their own fun!
They did not just sit on the train,
they played games of 'slap'
and told silly riddles!
My oldest went out of his way to drive his sisters crazy
and changed all the words of the Christmas carols being sung..
my youngest had some not so pretty moments
over silly things..
but out of all of them,
loved the MAGIC of Santa
and was so excited by the sleigh bell she was given...
As I sat back and watched them
I saw them as they are..
young people,
(no longer babies
or small children...)
with hurts and hangups..
and grace and compassion...
and their own ways of facing the world!
Its tough sometimes as a mom alone..
my voice is not deep or threatening...
I am smaller then my son...
and so my 'authority' is not always as easily exerted..
but I see the rhythm my family is finding..
and I am getting,
that while It may not look like I thought it might..
from where I sat tonight,
it looked pretty good!

4 comments:

  1. aww..you are fine..they don't need authority, they need a relationship, understanding, a soft place to land..the world will show them authority..you just need to show them love...you are a fantastic role model...that's the best you can be.

    I've learned the art of non-interference...this year I decided to let go...I gave my 15 year old the freedom to make her own choices...and trusted her to do so...at the beginning I worried about some of them...then she started coming home earlier, she started doing better in school, she started being sweeter and more fun to be around. We talk more, we laugh more and sometimes she makes mistakes but now that I'm not being "authoritative" it's really changed. Today I thought I was entering early altzeimers...I went to unload the dishwasher...it was empty already, I went to take the garbage to the curb..it was already out...I thought I was losing it..but it was her..she did it...I didnt' ask..she just did. I told her how much I appreciated it and that it really helped me a lot(it did) because it's such a busy time of year.

    They'll give you the respect you show them..maybe not 100% of the time...no one is perfect but they'll know 100% of the time that you are their mom and that you love them.

    Heard you're getting roasted soon! Have fun with that! Eddie is a hoot!

    Breeze

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  2. Hi Debbie,

    I have no idea what a "polar express" is but I think I get the picture. It looks like you guys had a fun evening.

    I agree with Breeze and the art of "non interference". Its a scary concept but it does work really well.

    I'm not sure what "getting roasted" means? I'm not sure that I want to know either! :)

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  3. breeze and steve..agreed and am learning and trying to let go and let my children be more 'self governing'..scary as you said!! :) Steve, you are funny!!! I am being 'roasted' on a blog (will post the link) in the next few months!!! My dear blog friend breeze nominated me...she's a tough act to follow however!!!!:)

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