Over the past 3 -4 years so much has changed.
Actually almost everything has changed.
I have come to know
that I have adjusted better to the new circumstances
then to the changes that the circumstances have brought.
I adjusted to going to work...
but I still struggle with the friends I no longer see
as a result of that change.
I struggle with the field trips I no longer go on...
and I struggle with the time that is no longer there.
I do not resent my job,
nor being a working mom!
I just wish everything had not changed...
I have adjusted to being a single mom..
I have adjusted to raising children from a broken home..
I have adjusted to their being in two homes
with 2 separate parents....
but the changes that they reflect I struggle with!
The anger that still comes out
and likely always will..
The confusion they will express in moments..
That is all a change from the happy go lucky children they once were.
I have adjusted to my new life..
I am glad to be here,
and learning daily how to survive.
BUT, there is no doubt that divorce
and they are changes you do not always
and changes you can do nothing about.
From the loss of support groups
and play dates,
and even 'couple' friends..
or the loss of luxuries like pedicures
and dinners out..
or the deep loss of security within
the hearts of your children...
its the changes that take the longest
long after your circumstances have become a second skin
and you cannot remember life 'before'..
the 'changes' will keep reminding you,
of all that you have been through
to arrive at the moment
you are living with in, now!