I rarely talk about my children's hurt.
it goes too deep.
I was taken back!
I went to have blood drawn!
3 1/2 years ago,
I sat in this same Dr's office
and the SAME lab tech drew my blood.
But there was a BIG difference!
on that day,
my 3 children were with me.
they were 4,6 and 9.
Their lives had just been shattered
and I had always told my children
that this was not a secret!
This was not their fault
and this was theirs to share!
and share they did!
They announced it in church..
(before I did..oops!)
They told the cashier at wal-mart,
the stranger who asked about their day!
they shared their hearts!!
They needed to!
as this man drew my blood..
they told him
that their mom and dad were getting a divorce!
They told him;
"my dad does not know how to love my mom."
"he married her too young."
"he had to leave her".
I smiled at them as they spoke,
as my heart wept tears of blood!
Their words were arrows
to my soul,
but I knew they must speak it!
I knew they would be free if they released the words
they held inside!
The poor man.
He did not know what to say!
He looked at me with pity!
I felt like a cast off piece of clothing,
the discarded one..
my shame exposed to this stranger!
But, my children..
their words broke from their mouths
releasing the hurt that held their hearts captive!
I knew then,
I know now,
that I have made many mistakes!
BUT, giving their words wings to fly..
released some of the hurt,
and helped some of the healing!
I would do it again,
stand vulnerable in front of the cashier,
shamed in front of the lab tech,
exposed in front of the waitress...
because it was a gift I gave to them!
and in this gift,
in moments I gave my very soul.....