Friday, February 12, 2010

oops..I did not see that coming....

it seems that while working as parents together..
whenever possible
is really best for the kids..
it can leave unexpected bruises on the heart!

I do not wonder if we should be together now.
In fact I understand deeply why we should not.
I care..but I am no longer hurt or sad..
and even seeing him with his love
causes no different feelings,
then seeing someone else I once knew well.
I can truly say acceptance has come..
closure has been found..
and true letting go has happened.

So why the bruise?
I don't wonder IF we should be together NOW
but being together as a team..
and doing it well..
made me wonder, for just a moment,
how we might have been THEN!
it was a glimpse at who we are now
in a situation we would have faced then.

It made me sadder then expected!
not regretful, not unsure, just aware..
that parts of us still work..
and yet I know..
that there are more parts of us that don't!
and we are where we should be.
So I take the bruise,
knowing there are more to come...
and I accept the moment for what it is,
a look back at what was;
an understanding of what could have been;
and then the realization that a moment does not compensate for a lifetime..
its just that, a moment!
one I did not see coming..
and one that passed before I realized it was gone!

and the journey continues..
one step at a time!


  1. I am sure your journey is far from over, but you have made so much progress!

  2. Wow, so true. I get wistful when the ex and I have great supportive moments too. Then again, it shouldn't be too much of a surprise. We married those men for some reason, right?


  3. You might have more to travel on this journey but at least you are able to communicate with him. That's the best part of it all.

  4. Just read both posts together. I know seeing your son hurt tore your heart out. And I also understand the bittersweetness of working will with your ex.

  5. Michelle-Thanks! I agree...a long way..long way to go..but a long way to get here!!:)

    T-yeah..there was that!!:)

    Mamma has spoken- AGREED!! we have communication! and that's HUGE!

    Secret agent-it really did tear my heart out!! :(

  6. I love your blog--it is so honest and real. You sound just like my friend Jess, it is as though she could have written a lot of this. I am going to send her your blog link.

    I am your newest follower! I really hope you will pop on over to my blog and follow back. I have two blogs, but my main blog is A Blonde Walks Into A Blog.Juliana.

  7. She writes- I agree. its all we have!

    Juliana- thanks for stopping by! I would love to check out your blog! I LOVE the name!!:)