Thursday, February 4, 2010

the next stage....

what is almost as good as an intact family
sharing in their childrens success and failure??

a divorced couple..sitting together..
with their daughter's teacher.
Not there for any other reason,
then they love their daughter!
They are there as a team.
They are there as a unit..
and they understand the roles are different,
the past is gone
and they own the future!

It is not easy to reach this place.
for some its not an option!
But, for my ex and I..
we have made some choices
some good and some bad..
but all impacting;
that have brought us to the place we are now.
I will be blogging this aspect more.

The past surfaces here and there..
but the relationship we have now,
is the one we shall carry into the future!

It is not always good..
in fact sometimes its bad!
BUT, OFTEN its better then expected!
We both play a role in this.
We both let things go!
and we have both had to change expectations.

We do not team parent!
That would involve complete agreement!
We do Co-parent! Along side one another..
a relay!
I parent in my home..
he parents in his...
and at times it overlaps!

We are making it work!
and we are reaping the rewards!
and we are both muddling through
what happens
when the one you loved
becomes the one who hurt you..
and the differences that were endearing
become stark..
and yet you STILL share children;
and for THEIR sake
need to try and do this right!

THIS is a journey in and of itself!
BUT, its a journey with only one destination!
the children!
Their security!
Their well being!
Their ability to be complete!

The Gift you can give when they can love you both with no walls!


  1. I respect that - my ex and I co-parent as well, including sitting together for many school events. I'm thankful I have a pretty easy realtioship with him so that it is possible.

  2. I agree that it is something to be thankful for! I know there are many who cannot say the same!!

  3. It all sounds refreshingly normal to me :0)