Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Another lightbulb went off

I realized recently that I have some serious issues with trust and fear...
DUH..:)
I realized however sometimes these fears bring on anxiety and reactions...
I will drive by somewhere that holds a memory
my chest will tighten
I will struggle to get a breath....

This is new....
it made me take action..
for me that is in the form of research
and reading
certainly counseling....

Books can be good and bad!
BAD, for example, I did not fear dying alone
until...I read in the book that its common
to worry about that!
GREAT...that one had not crossed my mind...
yet..:)

BUT , the good....
I worry about trusting a man..
how could I?
How would I know truth from fiction?
and yet, the lightbulb, as I was reading...
I don't have to trust a man!!
I have to learn to trust me!
When I trust my gut feelings
my instincts
my desires
When I trust my wants
my hopes
my dreams..
When I learn to trust me!
To say no when I am uncomfortable
To walk away when something feels wrong
To know that I don't need to accept the unacceptable...
Then I need not worry about trust!
It is a non-issue!

how freeing is that!!!!!??

3 comments:

  1. Gotta' love those lightbulbs!

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  2. So true. I actually read an article on this recently and was thinking of bringing it up on my own blog!

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  3. You're awesome--I love your introspection and the way you are working through this.

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