loosing my friend hit me hard...
I think the part that left me reeling..
was seeing her children,
and their heartbreak!
It literaly has haunted me..
I could hardly sleep last night.
BUT like all moments that stay with us,
it comes down to what you do about it.
I have stopped before saying no too quickly to my kids...
my girls are her children's age..
all I could think of last night,
is how much she might have given for another day!
so when it was time to turn out lights for bed,
I sat with them and chatted and loved on them instead.
When my girls wanted hot milk before bed,
EVEN though they had already brushed their teeth;
I said "OK".
When my girls wanted to give me a makeover,
even though they are dangerous with eye liner and mascara
I said "OK".
Its not life changing, its a start!
and every lesson in life
is the start or the end.
We either let it beat us and the lesson ends there..
or we let it teach us,
and the lesson is the beginning.
I hope this shall be the beginning,
I hope I do not quickly forget
a little girls tears
and a little boys sadness...
I hope that the lesson in the heartache,
makes it worth having been there to learn it.
and now, as I let go...
I do so knowing that my life has been touched
and changed..
forever.
My second greatest fear after losing a child is being lost to my children.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about your friend.
Breeze
Debbie, My dear mum died when she was just 34. I was just 10. I have very fond and happy memories of her. It is important to cherish the time with our children. Like Breeze, I have been scared of leaving my children but luckily they are now all of an age where they aren't dependant each day.
ReplyDeleteI have always had huge life insurance policies and a very detailed will as I had the fear of leaving them early as my mum did. I'm grateful that I have been able to see them grow into young adults at least. Hopefully I'll still be around one day to see grandchildren too!
Steve, I am so sorry that you went through that at such a young age!!:( I am sure it has shaped the father you are and you are a better man for it! Still wish for you, that particular hurt could have passed you by!
ReplyDeleteI too lost a friend this holiday, a father of two. His teen son was over the processions and had such a hard time. I am sorry for the loss of your friend and as the rest of the group, worry about leaving my children.
ReplyDeleteThey barely know their father and have talked about how awkward it would be to live with him.
Wills and insurance is really the only way to protect them. But time spent with you and the memories created are another sense of insurance. good job
I am sorry about your friend and her childrens loss.
ReplyDeleteIt breaks my heart.
Debbie this is beautiful. I so often think and pray for her children. I to am cherishing every moment. You just never know.
ReplyDeleteKirsten
(I am hoping this will post. I am on a new computer. I have not been able to post comments to your blog. I am not sure if it is the computer or my sign in.)
YAY!!! I figured it out!!
ReplyDelete